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09/08/2003 Archived Entry: "Recombinant Distraction..."

Recombinant Distraction...

So, there's a report today that peripheral Kennedy Michael Skakel may try to get a new trial because of possibly exculpatory testimony by... Kobe Bryant's cousin!!

This could be a breakthrough in distraction news, obviously cooked up by people taking their cue from George W. Bush's blurring of the line between the 9/11 attacks and Saddam Hussein.

Imagine it - the possibility that the Laci Peterson case could receive testimony from Gary Condit, or JonBenet Ramsey's family coming forward with the identity of Nicole Brown Simpson's real killer.

The possibilities are endless, and would surely aid in keeping Americans' eye off the Miserable Failure in the White House and all the other miserable faliures he's cooked up in the first three years of his one term.

Put your suggestions for recombinant distractions in my comments. Let's have a little fun here...

Replies: 5 people speak up

No, no, Blah3, Martha Moxley was done in by a shark attack in Florida. Or was it California? Whatever.

Or how about those killer bees from South America?

Posted by Metropolitan99 @ 09/08/2003 09:47 PM NY

"OJ killed Jimmy Hoffa!"

We clearly need a little program to generate these "Weekly World News" headlines.

Posted by Satan luvvs Repugs @ 09/09/2003 03:09 AM NY

"OJ killed Jimmy Hoffa!"

We clearly need a little program to generate these "Weekly World News" headlines.

Posted by Satan luvvs Repugs @ 09/09/2003 03:09 AM NY

Kobe Bryant comes out and says he has learned the location of Jimmy Hoffa's body. When they dig it up, they find a buried manuscript from the Unabomber when he was a child. This note reveals that he saw the man on the grassy knoll and it was a time traveling OJ.

OKay, so maybe I went too far. heh

Posted by Jason @ 09/09/2003 10:55 AM NY

Fox News has learned that Monica Lewinsky, leveraging her notoriety from the Clinton scandal of five years ago, is now earning her living by charging extremely wealthy men fifty thousand dollars per performance of the sexual act at the center of that scandal. Yet the truly shocking aspect of this story is Ms. Lewinsky's secret partnership with Lorena Bobbitt... a partnership that ensures that Monica's unwitting customers have experienced that act for the last time. Steve Doocy, how do you think those men's agonized screams would sound? Let's hear your impression...

Posted by Irfo @ 09/10/2003 07:21 PM NY

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